Things that Have Been Tugging at My Heart

each day, within my peripheral, i see thousands of people…literally. i have never been in a place where i am surrounded by so many, all the time! much of it is overwhelming. i find myself desiring more quiet than ever. much of it is sad. all of it, reminds me of why i am here.

i walk through the streets, and i see poverty. the elderly, having nowhere to go, in the streets begging. in so many ways, this is different from poverty in the states. one of my friends here, has been such an example of compassion for the poor. i am moved by her heart. she purchases food and snacks and carries them in her purse to give to those she comes across. i have to admit, i have been scared. i don’t know how to respond.

i see people just going through the routines of life, with no purpose or hope. people labor endlessly to make ends meet. some, i believe, work harder in a day than i do in a month’s time.

students doing what they’re told and losing the potential to live a life abundantly in all that they were created to live.

i see people doing all that they can to make it, even at the expense of others.

loneliness, despair, brokenness, hoplessness are a reality. people searching for a place in society. people wanting to be worth more. people wanting to break through “stuckness.” people needing hope and purpose. people needing something greater than themselves to break though.

how do i put actions to these things that weigh so heavily and are tugging at my heart?


(my walk to class on campus)


(at a local store)

Just Rub Them!

this is a common scene in this country because dryers are a rarity. it was hard for me to get used to crunchy socks and underwear. solution from my friends here.....just rub them for a little bit and it will soften again! everything seems to take so much longer here.

Thinking of Me!

haha. i received this picture in my inbox from my friend, jessica, after my last post. very cute. it so happens that cream puffs were served at her baby shower yesterday! great to know i was thought of! thanks, girls!

A Banana......or a Cream Puff!

yesterday, my teacher called me a banana - yellow on the outside, white on the inside. i was offended. no, i felt rejected by my own people. its ok for me to call myself a banana or a twinkie (its even ok for my friends to call me a banana), but i dont think i took it too well yesterday. i felt like she disregarded my asian background in that statement. "your thoughts are very western," she said.

after much thought, i have to agree with her. my thoughts and values that she is able to see or has seen, are very western. i thought much about why this bothered me, but at the end of it all, it comes down to my desire of wanting to be understood-to belong or be identified with something. the same reality holds when i'm in the states. i neither can identify completely with my "white" world, nor can i identify completely with my "yellow" community in monterey park. i am glad that i belong in the kingdom, and that that is my most important identity. i belong well!

also, why do people think asians are yellow. i am not yellow. i am tanned. i prefer to be compared to a.....hmmm....a cream puff! at least that is more of the tone of my skin color. there's this cream puff stand in the middle of the shopping center that always smells soooooo good. i am tempted to buy one, just because it smells so good. unfortunately, i am not a big fan of cream puffs.

I've Been Tagged!!!

lisa blough tagged me (thanks for thinking of me, lisa!), so here goes.

1. i am an extreme extrovert! on the myer's briggs, i did not answer even one question on the introvert side. my personality title on the myer's briggs is "social coordinator." surprised?

2. i am afraid of all living things except for humans! i have grown a lot in this area though. i can now be in the same room with some pets. :) i have to get over this fear this year, because i cant seem to avoid dragonflies over here...they're everywhere! people must think i'm crazy because sometimes when i'm walking by myself in the streets, i dodge and duck because i think they are going to fly into my face!

3. i do not know how to swim, but have made numerous attempts at trying to learn how.

4. i sing on the top of my lungs, like i'm a rockstar, when i drive alone. unfortunately, i dont have a car for the year, so i will have to put that aside for the time being.

5. i have probably eaten at home (as oppose to eating out) more in the last 2 months than i have in the last year combined!

6. i have not owned a television in the last 5-6 years.

7. my main source of communication is the phone. in the states, my cell phone minutes averaged 3500-4000 minutes each month. i hate writing emails!

8. i think i have ADD. i have never been diagnosed, but am convinced that i am. i cannot sit still for more than 5 minutes at a time. i either have to be playing with something in my hands or moving something. (it drives my friend, lisa bowyer, crazy!)

there you have it! kelly and krista, you're it!!!

Mid-Autumn Festival

yesterday was the "mid-autumn festival" or "moon festival." growing up, my sisters and i called it moon day!

the mid-autumn festival falls on the 15th day of the 8th lunar month. this is when the moon is at its fullest and brightest, to celebrate the abundance of the summer's harvest. the traditional food of this festival is the mooncake, of which there are many different varieties. haagen dazs even makes ice-cream ones!

the Mid-Autumn Festival is one of the two most important holidays here. the other being lunar new year. farmers celebrate the end of the summer harvesting season on this date...i guess it's a parallel to our thanksgiving. traditionally, on this day, family members and friends will gather to admire the bright mid-autumn harvest moon, and eat moon cakes together.

unfortunately, it was a rainy, cloudy day yesterday, so there was no moon to see!!! sad monkey. can you imagine? millions of people going outside to look at the beautiful moon to see that there was none?!!?! it's kind of like thanksgiving without a turkey!!!

my other thought was...if this is the second most important holiday here, why was school still in session?!?!! my friend tells me its because the moon comes out at night and school is during the day, :) but i still think a big holiday calls for a day of rest!!! are they trying to teach good work-ethic??? hmmm....

Embracing Culture

i have been here for about a month and a half now. much of me still longs for the comforts of home and anything familiar. i get this excitement inside anytime i see a foreigner here....wierd! i was thinking about this yesterday...my most joyous visit since i have been here was to the western import food store. it was lovely...i walked in and saw flour tortillas, blueberry muffin mix, mac & cheese, doritos!!! it was so soothing. i spent quite a bit of cash that day! i have come to a hard conclusion and it is that i need to let go of desiring familiarity and the comforts of home because it is preventing me from experiencing all that there is to offer here. i don't think that i can fully appreciate the place that God has me in if i'm not embracing the culture/food. financially, it really isn't wise anyway. for example, i bought a small bag of doritos for almost $5 at the western import store and today, i had a delicious lunch with a couple of friends and we each only paid an equivalent of about $1.50! WOW! it is ridiculous that i would spend so much on western food, when the food here is great! so, i am committing to wise stewardship of my finances, especially when it comes to food. i will have all the western food i want when i return home! i will, however, need to splurge on something on those extreme "homesick" days.

To Go or Not to Go???

that is the question. i woke up today with the question of whether or not to go to class. its been rainy here the last couple of days and a typhoon is suppose to go by today. so, as most of you may have already guessed, i chose not to go. i'm going to stay home and enjoy the dry indoors.

Split Pants....

or as some like to call them...."open-crotch pants." so, i was on the bus the other day with a friend, headed to the university, when i saw a baby with no pants or diapers on sitting next to us. i found this very odd and so, of course, had a conversation with my friend about it. VERY INTERESTING!!! 1.) diapers are not used here because of cost efficiency and that it would create so much trash with a population in the billions! 3.) bodily fluids are released anywhere and everywhere here! this kind of explains why people do not where shoes in the house! 4.) if babies or toddlers do have pants on, they wear "split pants." (click on link to read more). so mommy friends, what do you think? would you like me to send you a pair or two?

(just in case you were wondering....i did not take this photo...i thought about it, but didnt want people to think i was perverted or something!i still cant help but stare though!)

Laoshan Mountain

Today I went hiking with a several friends to Laoshan Mountain. It was beautiful! Enjoy the pics!